June 16, 2018

Happy Due Date Peanut! 

Today was one of those days I’ve tried so hard not to keep on my mind, but when you spend so much time thinking about this exact date... it’s so hard not to. It’s been looming all week. All the thoughts of what my life could look like right now. Why it doesn’t. Spending time with all my friends who are moms and wishing I could bond with them over that. It’s been a hard week. I was feeling great last week, and thinking I was fine and had everything under control, and then Monday came and the emotions were uncontrolable. It’s been a sad week, and a really sad day. But I have the most wonderful husband who got me up and out of the house for a date through Soho. We went to Purl Soho and I picked out some new fabric. We grabbed lunch at my favorite spot, By Chloe. And then we wandered in and out of stores and up and down all the best cobblestone streets. We laughed and I cried a little, and we had a really fun day. And tonight we “Celebrated” Father’s Day, in true Brady fashion, pizza and a movie in bed. We may not have a physical baby here, we are parents. He deserves to be celebrated. We have a little spirit baby up there somewhere. I’m truly believe that. I wear her date on my pinky everyday, and I think about her every hour. Maybe this is the worst of it. Maybe from here we can say goodbye to the sorrow, and move forward with faith. 

We we love you peanut. We wish you were here, but we will wait. Heaven isn’t so far away after all. 

xx

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Insanely grateful for him. Heavenly Father knew I needed him.

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You will be the very best dad one day, honey. I love you ❤️ 

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